Hope & Ham

The Ham has arrived. Its resting comfortably preparing for it's big day.
Don't tell me they are bad for me, artificially sweetened, full of fakery and
nastiness. I don't care. They taste heavenly, low-fat, no sugar, no real food
value-they are perfect, thick, rich and chocolaty. I'm going to eat them every
day until its uncovered that they are really bovine growth hormones
mixed with Hershey's chocolate syrup. Is that a bad thing?

Heres Miss Prickley Pants Simpson. Shes a bit of a pack rat. She took all

these eggs apart and then filled them with odds and ends from around

the house, an old eraser, a screw, belly-button lint, a stringbean, my

diamond bracelet, some bread. She goes about her business with a

determined air, she has a plan.

Pavlova